The only other person who truly understands my pain is Maye, because she suffers from the exact same problem and we usually chat till daylight beckons. She told me earlier that she wants to lead a normal life and stop screwing her life up with normal people. My sentiments exactly. This is how insomniacs like us are affected.
Bahh. This "sleeping disorder" shit is really bugging me.
---
Random Thought Number 1:
This has been the longest time I've stayed single since I foolishly trapped myself in the maze of love at the age of 14. It's been almost 5 months since my status quo has stayed single and I'm predicting it to stay that way for quite awhile.
In and out of 5 official relationships in 6 years. Ryan Rodriguese, Michelle Yip, Stephanie Quek, Bessy Tan and Janice Wee. 7 months, 8 months, 1 year, 2 years and 4 months respectively.
I don't know if I can say I'm in love now because my status quo says otherwise but I do know I love you.
I'd have to admit that I didn't treat Yip, Queky and Bessy like I should when I was with either. Maybe that's why I got karma back in ten fold when things ended with Janice.
So out of 3, I've been shot with one. My heart's going to break 2 more times before karma is on the even playing field.
You're karma number 2 and I miss the sweet saccharine feeling of being in love, proper.
Random Thought Number 2:
Met Ms. Tan and Ms. Chia at the wake yesterday and they said that the tourism job market is doing very well which explains why most of my fellow HTM-ians have already secured jobs.
I still have no idea what I want to do. Okay, at least the plan is to work first then head overseas to further my studies.
I just don't know which career path I want to embark on. Airline, Hotel or Attraction? Marcomms or PR? Though my dream career is Marcomms in an Airline, specifically SQ.
And I know for a fact that I'm running out of time.
Random Thought Number 3:
I'm going to prove that my words carry weight because actions speak louder than words.
Watch me.
---
She mentioned to me that my blog entries are becoming more and more depressing as the day passes. That the depressing entries only came about when I changed my blogskin.
Oh girl, the secrets you don't know about me.
---
*update 1227 hours.
Excessive blogging again I know. Boredom's the root of it. -mumbles-
TDP supp paper revision lasted a whole torturing hour. Okay, so it lasted 40 minutes and Jackie Ong spent the remaining 20 minutes preaching. Anyway, I'm the ONLY ONE who failed TDP. Ahhhhhh. So imagine, I had a 1 to 1 revision with Jackie Ong for a whole damn hour. -slaps forehead- Bloody bugger that I failed because of attendance because according to Jackie Ong, I did quite well for my coursework. Sigh. Ain't that the case for HT Seminars as well.
She kept going on about how smart am I, how I should used my strength in the Queen's language to "help" myself, to stop screwing up, asking if I've quit smoking, what am I planning to do after graduation, my family situation and blah blah blah. God, don't ask me what she was talking about. I was between falling asleep and giving her "Uh Huhs, Yes and No" answers.
Okay la. She's not that bad a tutor honestly. Just a lil erm, weird? Okay, maybe queer's a better word to describe her. She was pretty sweet and gave me pretty obvious hints on what topics to focus on for the paper. At least she cares unlike some tutors -coughfungcough- who don't give a shit fuck about the reasons to why I was on MIA mode the whole semsester.
So I'm going to be an angel now and go read up on the damn case study for TDP and write my 1, 200 word essay on the 2015 tourism masterplan (AGAIN!) for HT Seminars.
Mummy gave me a phone call from work while I was leaving school, that has left me with the creeps to come home tonight.
Mummy: Where are you?
Me: I just finished school. Going home now. Why?
Mummy: Will you be home tonight?
Me: Er. I don't think so. I should be going out.
Mummy: I want to talk to you but it's not a good time now because I'm at work.
Me: Uhhh. Okay.
I continued to recieve a text from her bf (which he obviously sent to the wrong person) that went:
"Dar, don't talk to her yet. Talk to her when I'm around."
OMFG. I'm super freaked. I'm trying to think what I did wrong this time around but I've been such an angel! Home for 2 days in a row. What have I done wrong?! -panic attack-
I predict that the talk will leave me cursing and swearing in tears, ignoring them completely for a week or so and getting accused of something I never did. It always happens when they decide to give me one of their "pep talks".
See why I don't like coming home?!
Anyway, yes I'm finally getting out of this lonely hell hole later. Unless someone decides to fly my kite. -glares-
"I want to waste my time with you."
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