My Goals for Student Internship Programme

To attain a commendation grade:
1. Make full use of the 23 weeks of SIP to be exposed to as many aspects of the job as possible.
2. Learn how to balance personal life and work life; time management.
3. Applying the skills and knowledge that I have learnt in school and picking up new skills and knowledge at the same time.
4. Learn how to handle human relationships with regards to clients and fellow colleagues.
5. Take responsibility to tasks assigned, be open to criticism; handle things like a working adult.

What I would really write if I didn't give two hoots:
1. Make full use of the 23 weeks to take a break from lecture notes, droning tutors and stupid project datelines.
2. Learn how to club on working days and survive the next working day.
3. Apply skills and knowledge I have learnt in school and picking up neither cause there is nothing to do in the first place.
4. Learn how to handle office politics, so bad that its even apparent to an intern on her first day.
5. Take responsibility to tasks assigned, be open to criticism and then go home and curse and swear about it; just like working adults.
*Additional Goal:
6. -clears throat. Learn more about eyecandy, woo, flirt and hello darling. (:

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I'm so effing bored at work. 2nd day in the row not doing anything for 8 hours straight. At least I was "entertaining" myself with e Journal yesterday.

Today marks my last day of work with the travel group - publishing (marketing) department. Tomorrow, its 4 months of exhibitions for me. *mumbles.

My supervisor just did my appraisal. Hmmm. Scores all not bad. All 4's except for two 3's and one 2. No 5 though. Everyone make a guess what got me 2 marks out of 5. Punctuality and attendance lor. What else. I have to fix this fucking problem.

"Blissful chained affinity"

Numbers On The Scales

Seriously, I doubt anyone would want to know how to put on weight. It seems like everyone's more interested in "How to lose weight". So anyway, I'll just list 5 methods on "How to put on weight" and "How to lose weight".

How to put on weight:
1. Make sure you have at least 3 full meals a day.
2. Get an office job and snack between meal times.
3. Daily dosage of ice cream or chocolates after lunch.
4. When you are bored, get creative and cook yourself something new.
5. Don't bother exercising.

How to lose weight:
1. Make sure you don't have more than 1 meal a day.
2. Sleep in the day and wake up at night. (Thus you miss all your meals)
3. Survive on Instant Noodles.
4. Find something to make you suffer from depression and insomnia at the same time.
5. Nicotine fixes curbs your hunger.

I'm not saying every method is absolutely healthy, then again, none of them are healthy but what the fuck, diets are equally unhealthy.

You must be wondering why in the world am I blogging this at 6 am in the morning. It's because I just cooked myself a plate of fried rice and a sunny side up. I swear I can cook. Bloody shiok.

Add on the fact that I've had a packet of instant noodles, 1 cup of cup noodles, half a huge pack of potato wedges, 2 hashbrowns and 1 cup of milo all within 12 hours. (including the fried rice I just had).

Guess what? I'm meeting Quek in awhile for MacDonald's breakfast. How not to get fat put on weight like that?!

"I'll take you to the candy shop"

Check, Uncheck

( ) Corrinne May - Safe In A Crazy World Concert, 10th August @ 1930 hours.
I hereby am looking for someone willing to go for her concert with me. Leave a comment if you're interested. Thank you.

( ) Butch Hunt Finals 2005 - Gotham Penthouse, 14th July.
With plenty of dates (Denise, Maye, Mac, etc.), I'm looking forward to a night of booze, cigarettes and maybe sex? Joking. I should be looking forward to a cranky mood the following day at work. Maybe, look for a potential partner.

( ) SIP Classroom Session, 2nd July @ 0900 hours.
Finally get to see my darlings. I've missed each and everyone of you so much. But I just realised with the classroom session on a Saturday morning, it means I can't club on Friday night. Fucktard. Honestly, I think I'll still club anyhow.

( ) Pay Day - 28th June, Tuesday.
Woohoo. Finally pay day is here. Hopefully the money will last for a month with all the necessary expenditure (eg. bills, transport & meals).

( ) e- Journal 1, 30th June, Thursday.
I've only drafted the bloody journal. I better get my ass down to doing it.

( ) Fix my sleeping hours.
I've been sleeping at ungodly hours. Within 1 month of SIP, I've already taken 4 MCs. To be precise, I've only produced 2 MCs, the other 2 days, no MC. Fucking screwed. Waking up to puke every other morning doesn't really help either.

( ) Pray, wish and hope.
My 1 month stint with the publications department is coming to an end on Thursday. 4 months of exhibitions horror awaits me on Friday.

( ) Watch what I eat.
According to Queky, I've put on weight. KNS. I'm not complaining I'm fat cause I know I'm not but I just like the way I am now or rather I was. I think its my daily dosage of ice cream/chocolates after lunch at work. Not to mention the junk my colleagues feed me.

---

Notes to remind myself what has yet to be done or what has yet to come.

Life's so monotonous that I have nothing to blog about anymore. Plus, I have no inspiration to write about anything.

I'm sick of flings, eyecandies and singlehood. Find me a girlfriend.

"My heart won't be your rag doll anymore"

The Best Friend

I love you. (:

Sex, Alcohol & Cigarettes.

Stripped to the bare.
Fingers trailing her collarbone.
Scent of alcohol and cigarettes.
Soft kisses on her neck.
Whisperings of sweet nothings.
Sounds of pure pleasure.

"J'aime des femmes"

Signs That Prove You Have No Life:
1. Wake up at 0640 every morning and head to work.
2. Leave the office around 1800 and head home.
3. Figure out what you should have for dinner and contemplate on whether you should do some cooking yourself. (I have been fucking cooking dinner. Yes I CAN COOK, you bitches.)
4. Watch the 7pm Channel 8 show. And whatever shows you have to watch. (I even remember what time, which channels are showing my shows.)
5. You're online almost 24/7.
6. You are stuck at home on Friday, Saturday and Sunday. (Knn)

You see, this happens when:
1. You're Single. (Totally single, not even dating anyone)
2. You're so fucking broke. (Trust me. When I say broke I mean BROKE till I can't leave my house.)
3. You don't fancy going out with acquaintances. (Yes, I'm a loner. But even if I wanted to go out with them, I have no money to do so)

Effects:
1. Get frustrated because you want to watch 2 different shows, showing at the same time.
2. Suffer from serious insomnia cause you are so fucking bored.
3. Fall so sick that you cry yourself to the point of exhaustion and fall asleep. (Ear Infection la kns.)
4. Blog nonsense. For example, like this.

Chatter Down, Comments Up

Title says it all. I'm taking Chatterbox (tag board) down.

People who have been faithfully reading would know that I previously had no chatterbox. It was because I was too lazy to fix the problem with enetation, thus came chatterbox.

Now I've finally fixed it. Just gotta edit the template that's all. No more tagging. Comments please.

"Victimise me"

Epitome Of Distraction

Job scope for the past 2 working days : Sending e-mails. I feel like a spammer already. Sent god knows how many fucking e-mails and I still have a whole list to complete by tomorrow. Fucktard.

---

I'm now seated at my in-charge's desk as she's now in BKK cause I need her computer and because the other one is fucking screwed. Argh. At least I'm getting my own soon.

So from where I'm seated now, I can see eyecandy (her back at least) at the corner of my eyes.

Oh yes, you must be thinking "Andrea's having a field day". Well, that was what I was feeling on the 1st day. Which also explains the "positive outlook on life" entry yesterday.

No no, don't be mistaken, I'm not upset that I get an eyeful for almost 8 hours a day. Its just that it's becoming too much of a distraction. Seriously.

And no, I'm not totally transfixed on her for 8 hours. I just find myself "looking with the corner of my eyes" at every movement she makes. Knn. It's fucking distracting please.

Now you're going "Nnb, cannot see also complain, see also complain". Then don't read my blog lah you shit head. It just occurred to me that, I really have to do something about this crush /obsession /infatuation /distraction (or whatever you want to call it).

So tell me, what should I do?
1. Just forget the whole thing for the rest of your life.

2. Make a move before the end of the month. (Which means hitting on her and if you choose this, suggestions please because she's really quiet and if I do make a move, its gotta be discreet. I'm on my Student Internship Programme.)

3. Get to know her better first and make a move later. (Note: I'll be with a different department from July onwards. Which actually doesn't matter because we're still in the same office.)

I'm asking for help here. So please. I'm really sick and tired of getting all confused on what I should do. I can't take it anymore.

"Don't know if I should let you know or wait it out girl"

Itsy Bitsy Teeny Weeny

Yet another disturbed night of sleep. Waking up time to time from ludicrous dreams. Diagnosed with viral infection. On my way to work, man next to me on the MRT couldn't stop shaking his leg.

Pretty bad start to mid-week Wednesday. To me at least.

No, I'm not going to whine about how bad my day has been. Which morons "offended" me or how certain parts of my hair sticks out in the morning.

It's on mornings like these when I truly appreciate the genuine care and concern shown to me even by strangers.

Cell rings at 0600 sharp. Caller ID reflected 'Best Friend' calling. I was about to press the answer button and scream my lungs out at her because I'm supposed to still have at least another 30 minutes of sleep.

I didn't scream of course. I was too groggy and half asleep to scream. Plus, she gave a bright and cheery Good Morning and followed on to invite me for a McDonald's breakfast date. **1st thing that made my day. Don't ask why, it just did.

My colleague went down to buy some food and drinks for teabreak. Pssst. The big bosses are all away. She being the sweet girl she is, she bought me Chocolate Yan Yan! *beams. **3rd thing that made my day.

Now I'm going to the 2nd thing that kept me smiling for the rest of the day.

After my half-eaten lunch. It was terrible Hong Kong Noodles (knn. $4 can?!) and loss of appetite (nothing to do with eyecandy sitting opposite me), my colleagues and I sat around and had a chat.

Eyecandy then asked "Are you feeling better?" (note: accompanied with a grin and the look of "Are you sure you are sick or were you just lazy?"). *double beam.

Honestly if she didn't give that look, I would still be as happy. But anyway, I asked her on MSN later what was that look for and all she did was say "What look? Haha." and the "Angel" emoticon. *triple beam.

Okay, I'm mad and obessed but my point is, its the little things that matter when you least expect it. So go on, make someone's day. I'm going to try to make someone's day tomorrow. Regardless of whether I know the person.

"When pride builds me up till I can't see my soul"

Safe In A Crazy World

Today I present to you my dysfunctional life. In total, I have 2 *cough cough* official spouses. Okay okay, maybe not spouses but partners.

First and foremost, my husband, Mr Adam Brody.


He's like the cutest guy ever. I mean he's geeky, humourous and such an odd ball. Perfect man to marry. Sorry he's taken by me already.

Of course there's my wife, Miss Katherine Moennig.


Fuck. She's fucking hot. Tell me my fellow grrls out there. Don't you just want her so bad? And again, SHE'S MINE.

---

So yes I have this thing for dark hair, a charismatic smile and a set of eyes that melt your soul.

Eyes being the most important of all. The twinkle when one smiles, the glint of excitement and the sadness that just shows.

Bringing myself back into reality, scent is important. 2 people smell different even when they are using the same perfume or cologne.

I remember the smell from 3 years ago, Estee Lauder - Pleasure For Men.
I remember the smell from 3 months ago, Clinique - Happy For Men.
I remember the smell from 3 days ago, I have no idea what the hell you were wearing.

Now I want to know what's YOUR smell.

That sounded sick but I'm sure some understand what I mean. All I know is that I'm in deep shit this time round. I've fallen so hard for someone I hardly know.

So it wasn't love at first sight, it was more like love at third sight.

I've landed my focus on something completely out of my mind and literally out of my reach. I feel like some sick psycho star struck hormonal raging teenage girl.

This obsession has to stop. Somehow, I don't know how.

"I try to smile my tears away"

Human Scum

Humans are all judgmental creatures. Everyone judges someone else in one way or another. Be it looks, rumours or just what someone does or says.

I admit I do that too. Its in all of us, isn't it? You'll always unknowingly judge someone.

You want to know what's the most disgusting type of humans? Friends who judge and then backstab. Wait then they shouldn't be called friends. You two faced bitches.

Firstly, its none of your business. Secondly, you tell me this and then go around talking about me. Hello, haven't you heard the Chinese phrase, "The walls have ears".

Then there's the other type, let's name the person A. A tells B that C was talking about me. The next day D tells B that A was talking about me with C. The irony.

Since I'm such a hot topic, yall are very much welcomed to continue.

---

Its back to work again tomorrow. *sigh. I can't wait for my pay day. Its time to return all the debts and owe no one anything. Before they think you owe them the world.

"obesession kills"

Tempted To Touch

I'm so dammit cranky. Like major. 2 and a half hours of sleep. Who wouldn't feel sleepy? When Andrea's sleepy, she's cranky. You know how it works.

Today is zho sai kang day at work. Been sorting fucking god knows how many hundreds or thousands of NAMECARDS. Geographically, niche and alphabetically. After 8 hours, I'm still not done with it.

Entry in e-journal:

10 June 2005, Friday
Today, I learnt my ABCs. I can
memorize my ABCs now. Abcdefghijklmnopqurstuvwxyz. I feel so accomplished.
*double beams.

Sorry, just being bitchy.

Gotham Penthouse last night (explains the lack of sleep). Butch Hunt 2005 Preview. I shan't comment on the contestants. Go preview them for yourselves and you'll know why I'm not saying anything. Haha.

It feels good to be back in the scene. It felt like home (no, not the old monks) for PLU (people like us). Haha. Almost everyone in the community was there. Turnout for finals is going to be even bigger I reckon.

Heard Rupee's Tempted To Touch so many times on both Perfect 10 and Power 98 today. Even the radio has to remind me of what kind of person I am now. Thanks. But I don't give a fuck shit.

I received 2 pieces of "news" there as well. Okay, 1 piece of news and 1 "test water result". Lol.

I wouldn't say the news was bad news. It was more like "Omg. I'm so fucking insulted news". But then again it's none of my business.

"Test water result" not good not good. I've got my eyes on you and you try to match make me with your friend. Of course not good result la. Argh.

"I'm not who I used to be"

Divine Intervention

On MC yesterday. Bloody (literally) cramps. Made me sulk through my whole day.

Today's a brand new day. I'm in an extremely good mood. Like extremely. *beams. Its as if angels touched me with the tips of their fingers. You get the gist.

Nothing, noone and I repeat, nothing can spoil my mood today. *double beam. :))

"I've got my eyes on you"

Straight Isn't Normal, Its Just Common

Serious Monday blues. It felt like getting knocked down by a SBS bus over and over again. Not consecutively but after short intervals.

Tested waters today. *sigh. Obviously not a positive test result but there's still hope I reckon. I hope time's on my side. What's yours will be yours.

When you really just need to cry it all out, the tears just seem to disappear. When you don't, its like Chinablack Jade (ladies night; free flow house pours).

I made plans. Wrote notes. Thought through it carefully. Made mental notes.

I couldn't and didn't carry the plan out in the end. My best friend saved me. Thank you dear.

Thank you for those who still let me know I have you guys around. Thanks darlings. Like Marilyn says, "Good or bad, life continues". I shall bear that in mind.

---

Back from a smoke break with my colleague. She lives opposite me. Office hours smoke together. After office hours, still smoke together.

Monster In Law with Queky and Julia after work. Its a good movie to watch if you're feeling crappy or just plain depressed. The movie's really funny. Go catch it. I feel like slamming some faces in cakes and whacking them with a pan after the movie. Sweet.

Thank you Queky for everything. I'm glad I didn't lose you today. :))

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Anyway, check this blog entry out. Good stuff.

"Anything that you want me to I'll do it"

The Last Dinner

I cooked dinner for myself. When I say I cooked dinner, it doesn't mean maggi mee. I cooked myself a nice proper meal.

Its always nice being alone. Spending some quality time with yourself. But when it becomes excessive, its not so fun after all. Especially when you have a phobia of being alone. Then again, who doesn't fear loneliness.

December 2002. The loneliest month I've spent in my life. Should I go through it all over again? It was after all, after that month that my loved ones came back to me.

Engulfed and buried by work. That's what cause December 2002 to be so memorable. Can I do it again? I hardly doubt so. I'll try no matter what.

I miss swensen's sticky chewy chocolate fights. I miss writing I hate you all over your desk. I miss Fantasy Island and Shaggy's Angel. I miss bus 55 rides to and fro school with you. 4 years of memories. 4 different people.

Goodbye world for awhile.

Caught Up

Its nice to wake up at 2 in the afternoon. Finally caught up with much needed beauty sleep. Irony is I'm now awake at 7 am and I haven't slept cause I'm at Yihan's with Queky.

The two are asleep and here I am typing away on Yihan's computer. Sweet.

Its a Sunday which means in about 24 hours, Eyecandy. Heh. I know I've been going on and on and on about Eyecandy. But hey, its MY blog and you're always welcomed to NOT read it.

Week 3 of SIP. I seriously hope that this week is going to be exciting because I'm getting sick of "acting busy". Really I am.

After almost 3 months, I suddenly miss you. But then again, its all over and I don't want it back.

December 2002 starts on Monday. Good Morning world.

And I can't figure it out but I'm so
Caught up
Got me feelin' it
Caught up
I don't know what it is
But it seems she got me twisted
I'm so caught up
Got me feelin' it
Caught up
I'm losin' control
This girl's got a hold
I'm so caught up
Really feelin' it

The Long Day Is Over

Listening to Norah Jones again, that pretty much explains the title and my mood. Its been a bad Friday. Noone knows how bad.

My eyes are shutting as I type. I haven't been getting enough sleep, about an average of 4 hours a day?

Smoke breaks, lunch and her are the only things that are keeping me from breaking down while working.

Suddenly the world world came crashing down on me. I don't even know how I feel. I just stone the minutes and hours of the days away.

With too much free time and travelling time alone, thoughts flood my head full. So much so, that there's this irritating headache that refuses to go away. Fuck.

She's a good distraction. I found myself smiling at the stupidest things. What stupid things? That's my secret. Limiting my thoughts with reference to her though. I don't want a distraction to end up an obsession.

Plus, to everyone there, I'm so young and blah blah. Why would she be attracted to a lil girl like me? But then again, I've always preferred doing the chasing rather than the other way around. Okay, I'm thinking too much. Its the only way to stop all the pain.

It feels like December 2002 all over again. Maybe I'll turn back time and do what I did in December 2002. No not maybe, that's just what I'm going to do.

"The twinkle in your eyes when you smile"

Look Who's Talking

Dinner at TM with Quek. Pastamania was it. 3 slices of garlic bread, bowl of mushroom soup, coke and chicken sausage spaghetti without peas in aglio olio style. Yes I finished it all. Wipeout please. Fuckshit full now.
Thanks Queky for ditching your plans and meeting me for dinner. Really appreciate it dear. Loves.

I never felt more comfortable going to work in tapered pants, shoes and polo tee, carrying my Crumpler. All the office wear and heels seems so fucking wrong on me. Plus, not to mention, its fucking uncomfortable.

Work was hell busy today. All of a sudden, everyone has something for me to do. Hello, I've only got a pair of hands and quite an empty brain. It was good, time passed real fast and I was also busy chatting and laughing at stupid things with my supervisor.

I learnt plenty of news things about myself today. That I'm a liar. *gasp. That I'm oblivious to everything else around me on purpose. * big gasp. That when it comes to friends, I would pick quantity over "quality". *GASP. Thank you for informing me. I really appreciate it. Like really.

My perception of relationships has changed since the previous. I'm not oblivious to it. My best friend told me the same.

I've never bothered about what people said about me and that according to my 2 besties, it irritates them cause anyone can say anything and I won't give two hoots. Anyway, like Quek says, its now "Andrea fights back time". I'll keep it short and sweet.

How much of me do you know in about a month? You know no shit. Judge if you want, I don't give a fuck shit.

Oh yeah. One thing I didn't learn? According to you I'm in denial of reality. Check the dictionary for Abnegation.

Okay, game over. Bedtime.

"And like a blade you stain"

Identity Crisis

First and foremost, HAPPY BIRTHDAY MEL! :))
Hope you enjoyed your party on Friday and have fun with your Lomo! Have a blast and may all your wishes and future endeavours be fufilled. I love you loads and I'll always be here for you kay sister? Once again, Happy 20th! Loves.

Slotting rate cards and sales letters for one whole day, basically a brainless job. So as I was doing the mentioned, I decided to give my lil brain a nice workout. Now I've finally concluded that I am one sexually (in terms of preference) disoriented 19 year old.

As most of you or rather, everyone knows I'm not attracted to the opposite sex (note: minus my husband, Adam Brody). Physically, mentally or even emotionally its almost been impossible.

I've only had 1 serious relationship with a guy and it ended up in a pretty big mess. Considering I fought with my best friend literally in school because of him. The infidelity and lies. Men.

Then there was (note that I use was not is, I prefer to think that he's dead) my father, who was pretty much the same. Infidelity, lies and violence. Men.

Add on the fact that I preferred girls since I was 13 even before my first and only till date BGR. My conclusion: I still like girls better.

"A hot minute for a life of sorrow"

Boys Are Smelly

I'm so tired now that I can fall face flat on my keyboard. I'm so hungry that I can eat a whole field of grass with cows grazing. I'm so cranky that I will shoot the next person who pisses me off.

Read the title again. Yes, boys are smelly. David & Goliath. Did I spell it correctly? Fuck it. Random but it's because I saw some David & Goliath products earlier. Funkay shit. Boys are smelly, throw stones at them. *beams.

Work's been fine. No complains except that I dread having nothing to do. That's the ultimate torture.

Bugis-ed with Dawn and Pris on Monday. Town-ed with Dan on Tuesday. Window shopping with Dawn tomorrow. Eh. I don't want to go already. Its the dammit Great Singapore Sale and I've already filed "Chapter 11" (Tourism Students, remember your Airline Business stuff anot?).

Window shopping makes me 'gian' only please. I already saw a couple of things today. )):
Paul Frank's - I Love Julius Pouch (Okay I know I have one already but this one is different!), Voodoo Dolls Skirt, Shoes, Le Tigre Polo Tee, Havaianas (Yes yes, I have 2 pairs but I want more!). Aiya, neh neh no money.

Anyway, main purpose of blogging is to announce..... *drumroll... I've found a motivation to wake up at 0630, Monday to Friday and tahan 8 bloody long hours. *giggles. Eyecandy alert! Woohoo. Its a small small world. *giggles. Okay, enough of being cute. Nighty night night. Lol.

I still like pretty girls.