Fear

I'm awake after 4 hours of sleep. This is already the second day I'm awake automatically. Decided against going back to sleep not because of the fear of not being able to get up, but the fear of the recurring nightmare.

My dreams or nightmares are always so surreal, so much that when it happens, it's like an played down deja vu. Like Phoebe in Charmed, I have the "power to predict", except my "supernatural powers" only apply when I'm asleep.

To prove my point, this dream on Monday, 12th December 2005 came true; Sweet Dreams Are Made Of These.

I'm freaked, seriously spooked. I fear the end of the weekend because that's when my nightmare may just happen.

I never feared the weekend as much as I fear it now. The past month, weekends meant euphoria. These were the days that made all things bad during the week alright all over again.

I need to learn to not stress myself out. I don't want my anxiety attack to strike again. For better or worst, I'll let God unveil the events he has planned for me.

"A nightmare of constant fear,
a nightmare never so surreal.
On my cheeks were fallen tears,
tears my heart fell for you."